0.5k Underachiever’s Run

Saturday, May 15th | Crossroads

    CALLING ALL UNDERACHIEVERS – trust us, you want to answer this call. This event is perfect for you!


    IT’S BACK and heading to The Crossroads!


    The 0.5k – The Underachiever’s Run… if you can even call it a run. This event takes you across 0.31 miles – 1,640 feet – 19,685 inches. It’s unlike any other run (and more like a walk to the next bar)!

    Pizza, Champagne and Donuts – Say What?!?

      The 0.5k – The Underachiever’s Run will start off with a pizza party at Parlor. There, you can carb load for the “big race” and “warm-up” before the “run”. At race time, you’ll be sent off with a “boom” to Grinders.


      Don’t worry, we will keep you hydrated along the way with a water station. Fear you may need first aid? Don’t worry, we have that covered too. The kit may or may not contain only lollipops, but hey, it will be there!


      Upon finishing this clearly physically and mentally taxing 0.5k, you’ll celebrate crossing the finish line with – what else but champagne and donuts! Oh and some victory music by DJ Ashton Martin!

      Get Those Tickets!

        Before you ask… Here are the Answers to your Questions

          • What comes with registration?
            • Awesome race bib to prove you actually participated
            • 1 free slice of pizza to carb-load before the “run”
            • 1 free donut and glass of champagne to celebrate crossing the finish line!
            • A fanny pack to keep all of your belongings in
            • A finisher award – you know, for those bragging rights
            • Specials on Truly, Sam Adams and Dogfish Head drinks
            • A 0.5k Euro-style sticker that you can stick wherever you’d like to prove that you’re in the runners club
          • Do I actually have to run?
            • Um, no… This is called the Underachiever’s Run, meaning don’t overdo it, buddy.
          • How far is a 0.5k?
            • TL;DR the info above… it’s .31 miles -or- 1,640 feet. It’s basically around the block.
          • What time does the event start?
            • The “run” starts at 1pm, but feel free to join us for the carb-loading (aka: pizza party) any time after 11:00 am.
            • Before you ask, the official party ends at 4:00 pm but feel free to stay as long as you’d like.
          • What do I wear?
            • You can wear whatever you’d like, but we recommend your best underachiever outfit.
          • ALL of this walking is going to make me thirsty, will there be any drink specials?
            • We know, that short walk will leave you needing a nice cold, refreshing beverage. There will be specials on Truly, Sam Adams and Dogfish Head!
          • Is there an age limit?
            • Yes, this is essentially a bar crawl so all participants must be 21 and older!!
              • Nobody wants to hang out with a baby at a bar!
          • Can I bring my baby/toddler/child along with me?
            • Nope, sorry. This is for ADULTS (21+) only!
              • Yes, even if they’re in a stroller. NO KIDDOS!!
            • While we’re on the subject, you can’t bring your dog either.

          In Case You Need Proof that it’s a great time

          Official Beverages for Underachiever’s

          Are you such an Underachiever you don’t even like to decide what to drink? We got you. You’ll be able to enjoy delicious specials at all locations from Truly, Sam Adams, and Dogfish Head canned cocktails! If you need help pouring them into your mouth, just let us know.

            We know you love free stuff so keep your raffle ticket handy at the after-party for a chance to win this amazing bumpboxx from Truly! Don’t worry we already put it in your fanny pack-et so you don’t have to keep track of it. You’re welcome.

            Amazing Sponsors

              Achievers of all kinds (over AND under) need to treat themselves every now and then. What better way to do that than with a massage. Make sure you stop by and set up a post-run massage from Sacred Roots!

              Achievers of all kinds LOVE ice cream! Our local favorite, Betty Raes, has 27 flavors of ice cream from classics to culinary creations. Shakes, sundaes and drinks, ice cream sandwiches with cookies baked in house, and more!

              Amazing Sponsors

              Achievers of all kinds (over AND under) need to treat themselver every now and then! What better way to do that than with a massage! Make sure you stop by and set up a post-run massage from Sacred Roots!

              Jimmy John’s is the Freaky-Fast Ultimate Underachiever sponsor!

              All participants will receive specials on Smirnoff Cocktails!

              Renewal by Andersen can help with all of your window needs! They can also help you warm up for the “run” so be sure to say hey!